I have so many stories…don’t we all? Am I the girl who lost her virginity without consent at age 14? The woman who became a mother at 31? The woman who has been divorced twice..and still believes there is a partner out there who will be just right?
Am I the businesswoman? The spoken word poet? The professional coach? The thought leader who wants to turn the world on its head?
I am layers of story. I am a story club sandwich on rye with extra mayo.
Today, my story is that my family is riddled with cancer. My mother survived breast cancer. My father didn’t survive lymphoma. My brother didn’t survive a brain tumor. My sister-in-law is looking pancreatic cancer straight in the eye and saying, “Fuck you!” and we don’t yet know where that story will end.
What makes our cells go rogue? How can we adapt to this mutation? How can we dodge this bullet? Or meet it with grace and power?
How can I assure my kids that I’m not next? My oldest daughter has recurring nightmares of my death since my brother died. I just lost a good friend to mistaken gunfire in Egypt. He was a shaman, and a gift to all who knew him. Death is not choosy.
My story today is that I’m alive. And tomorrow, I may not be. And I am not afraid. Most of the time.
I know my story needs to be heard because we are all living in the face of death. Most of us have been touched by death. All of us eventually will be. How do we make peace with this relationship between this world and the next? How do we live fully? How do we greet our death when it comes? When we can look death in the eye, we can live forever.
Who are you now?: I am a mother, a poet, a lover, an artist, a coach, a warrior, a goddess, an instigator, an entrepreneur, a liar and a cheat, an angel in disguise, an inhaler of breath, an idea waiting to happen, a writer, a particle of God.